That’s why when you decide on how you want to react you need to consider two things. The first one is to look closely at how long has he been ignoring you. After that, you need to know why he has ignored your texts. Yet, even after finding out, you must be left in confusion. It’s typical to feel that way since being ignored triggers denial, pain, and confusion. To end the confusion and help you sort out your thoughts and feelings, you need these 13 tips:
1. Don’t jump immediately to a conclusion
The first thing to do when a guy ignores your texts is to reflect properly. You need to know exactly whether he is ignoring you, he is busy or is ghosting you. As you’re reading this sentence, you might be wondering and saying but how can I define it? Well, when he is ignoring your texts will put you on hold for a couple of hours or days. Whereas, if he is ghosting you, he will leave you on delivered on read or delivered for a few days, weeks, or even months. During this time, he will be active on his social media but he won’t reach out to you. Once, you define it, you will know how to react. Because the timeline of how long he is not responding to you makes a difference.
2. Be confident and don’t lose your sense of reason
Indeed, with being ignored comes also the crushed confidence and pride. You will be dealing with low self-esteem because you feel rejected and lost his attention. What impacts your self-confidence is also getting mixed signals. The moment that you’re confused, you will start to lose your sense of reason. All that confusion will put pressure on you and slowly you will start to lose your temper.
To avoid it, you need first to accept your feelings. Try to see things from another perspective, be subjective. Adapt a new behavior. Try to not overthink. Surround yourself with people who love and support you.
3. Do not initiate a text or double text
If a guy has been ignoring you constantly then he is not interested in you. Maybe he wasn’t initiating any text and wasn’t trying to get to know you more. This is one of the main signs that a guy doesn’t feel the same as you do. In this case, you need to take a step back and see the situation from a different point of view. Because of your feelings, you need to detach for a bit to know how to react.
Do not disturb him again; Try to not react at all and instead work on your feelings. Try to understand what you’re feeling. Give him the taste of his own medicine, ignore him back.
If you have been constantly trying to understand him, gave him space but he didn’t answer, then ignore him back. Make sure to reflect on how you impacted your partner too and for how long he has been ignoring your texts.
4. Reflect on your behavior concerning them
Sometimes you get caught up in your relationship that you stop reflecting on what you’re doing or feeling. So, if your boyfriend, husband, or partner is ignoring you for a day or more is better to stop and think. What I advise you is to put yourself in his shoes. Maybe you might have misunderstood him and maybe you are not understanding his attachment style or love language. If he is the type of guy who doesn’t like texting, he will not show his interest or love for you via text messages. That’s why finding what his love language is then you might understand why he is acting this way.
5. Check if you need to apologize
If you recently had a fight or any type of misunderstanding that might be the reason that he is ignoring your texts. If you have done something before making him feel bad or you hurt him, try to apologize. Know that apologizing doesn’t make you feel small or unimportant in the eyes of your partner. As Scher & Darley (2007) stated the apology serves to smooth or make things better between two people. So, if he is ignoring your texts and you initiating the arguments and did wrong to him, try to apologize. Make him feel valued and seen. Then depending on your arguments or fight, you choose what you want to say.
Try to be specific and keep your text short. Let him know that you’re taking responsibility for your actions. In the end, come up with a solution. Let him know how you will change the mistake that you made.
6. Check up on him to see what’s wrong
How he reacts to a certain situation depends on his personality and how he deals with his feelings. If he just disappears suddenly after everything felt fine in your relationship you can text after some days. If he is fearful-avoidant or stubborn then you should let him have some space but check up on him after a while. You must be wondering what happened and what could have gone wrong. A fearful-avoidant ignores your texts because he is dealing with his feelings and thoughts. The moment that he feels the relationship is progressing and you’re getting closer, he decides to disappear. That’s why is important to understand the psychology behind your partner’s actions.
If you have been in a long-term relationship, it will be easier for you to know what he thinks and feels. Try to understand the psychology behind a player and a fearful-avoidant.
These are way too different but can easily be mixed.
7. Make and treat yourself like a valuable woman
If a man likes to be pursued or chased then that’s not a problem or something weird. But, what makes it hard to understand and deal with is his effort. If he leaves you to do all the job and enhance the relationship then that’s no good. If a guy is ignoring your texts because he wants to seem hard to get then you better step up this game. – First, what you need to do is take a closer look at his behavior. Check if he plans dates, wants to know you better, or spends time with you. – Second, check how often he ignores your texts and when he replies to you. If this happens quite often and he chooses to reply only during the night then he is just casually chilling. This means that he reaches out to you only when he needs you. In this case, it is better to not reply. – Third, focus on yourself for some time and give him some space to reflect on his decisions. Let him adjust to your absence for a while.
8. Don’t be a part of his orbit
When you are willing to walk away that’s when a man starts to take you seriously. If he has been ignoring you for a week and then suddenly coming back, he is doing it for a reason. Especially, if you’re just dating then he might be keeping his dating options open. What you need to do when he ignores your texts is to not react and be wild. You need to understand that you are just dating and you’re not exclusive yet. Nowadays, no guy commits to you if he isn’t making it official with you. That’s why you need to keep your dating options too. I am not implying that you need to use this to make him jealous or feel bad about himself. Just keep exploring because you don’t want to be stuck with a guy that isn’t interested in you fully.
9. Be respectful
The first feeling that is aroused after being ignored is pain, rejection, and nervousness. That’s why you might immediately be annoyed and mad. You get that feeling of irritation because you are being in denial. Now, to not make any instant mistakes, you need to calm down. As psychologist Dan Siegel stated, a part of your brain tells you to make a quick solution and respond fast. The other part, tells you to take things one step at a time.
Try to write down whatever you’re feeling. Vent to a friend or a family member. If you seem to not many any type of progression, try to book a session with a therapist.
10. Send him one last text
If you are looking for closure and he has been ignoring you out of nowhere, text him. Most of the other sources might advise you to not do it because it might make you look desperate. Or you will give him all the right to manipulate or control you if you put him on a pedestal. Well, these statements are not wrong but our relationship experts do not agree at some point. If it makes you feel better and helps you to move on from this relationship, you can text him. When he has been ignoring your texts for a month or more, write to him one last text. Just show him your decisions and whatever your feeling towards him.
11. You need to continue with your life
If you were just talking to this guy and he is ignoring texts, you need to move forward. I know that it might become an obsession to some point especially if you have strong feelings for him. You will start to fantasize about him and when he ignores your texts, you might think he wants you to chase him. Well, that might be the reason for the low percentage. Hence, in most cases, this means that he isn’t interested in dating you. Once, you start feeling constantly that he is taking most of your time and it is making you overthink, just detach from him. I know that’s not something easy to do but start slowly. Try some activities for a while that will keep you occupied. Go out more and try hiking or reading, anything that will help you to detach from this fantasy.
12. Check if you’re thinking clearly or if your attachment style guiding you
Hmmm, this is the most important thing to do. Have you ever stopped and thought about what is causing him to ignore your texts or is that was is happening? If you have an anxious attachment style then you need more attention and constant reassurance. This might make you paranoid and you might think that he is constantly ignoring your texts. In reality, he might be busy or just going on with his daily life. Adult life is quite busy and it goes pretty fast. That’s why you should be understanding. Once, you know your attachment style, you will know whether he is ignoring your texts on purpose or not.
13. Know that you’re not responsible to make him lose the “attitude”
When you were a caregiver all your life and an empath, you might think that you need to fix him. Well, know that is not your responsibility to change him. Yes, you can help him to get rid of bad behaviors but do not try to make a new person out of him. If he is constantly ignoring your texts but still tries to communicate and spend time with you, then that’s fine. When you’re dating it’s harder to deal with this problem because you don’t know what’s going on. Whereas, when you know his personality and his texting pattern, it’s easier to know what to do.
Texts to send when you have been ignored
You need to send a text to a guy who has been ignoring your texts only on some specific occasions. If you need closure, to know what happened suddenly, or want to make him miss you at some point you can text some of these texts. One of the texts a guy can’t ignore is supportive, funny, or flirty texts.
“Hey, went to Trader Joe’s today and you can’t believe who I saw”. “Knock, knock, are you there?” “I thought to text today on the 31st of October since you’ve been a ghost lately.” “I might think that you need some space right now, and I will give you the universe.” “I thought that maybe you want to share what we’re feeling or going through right now.” “I am not quietly aware of what might have happened here but if I made you feel uncomfortable or bad, I am sorry.”
If you have been in a long-term relationship and he keeps ignoring also this text, give him a call. If he doesn’t pick up that call then it’s better to move forward and focus on yourself.
One last time: What to do when he ignores your texts?
When he ignores your texts you need to be calm and think clearly. Now you might feel rejected and that he is not giving you the same attention as he did. That’s why the most important thing to do is to detach, not react immediately, and reflect. It’s quite understandable that no one likes to be ignored, not even for a second. Yet, if you’re anxious then you start to overthink more and you check every little detail. Before making any instant decision that might harm you, your partner, or the relationship, try to understand yourself. You’ll be at peace only when you draw your boundaries and know what you expect from a relationship! Wish you the best, Callisto
