Everyone has been in love at least once in their lives. Some lucky ones have experienced it more than once. Even the most unromantic or prosaic person would have fallen in love at some point, no matter how much they might try to deny or hide it. But why do most people find it so difficult to describe the feeling of love? What exactly is love? Where does this little butterfly come from and how do you know you are in love? And does love last forever or is it only a fleeting breath of fresh air? Let’s answer all your questions.
What Does Love Feel Like?
Poets, writers, romantics and scientists have all tried to describe the feeling of love in their own ways. While these creative geniuses look for the intangible magic and all emotions behind love, scientists and researchers search for the chemical releases and changes in the body and mind which subsequently lead to drastic changes in behavior and mood. However, the strange fact is that whatever is your explanation or logic, the experience of love is different for each person. Yes, it is a game of neurochemicals but it is also a ‘bespoke’ feeling, something that is unique to only you. And that, perhaps, is the magic of this most basic of all human emotions! There are several peripheries of love too. Lust, attraction, attachment, warmth, friendship are all elements of love – whether it is your first love or your 10th! From teenage love to finding love again in life after a divorce, it is indeed unique and can take you by surprise. What’s even better is that you may find all these elements in your connection with one person in varying degrees. If you do, then love leads you to the ultimate search of all – your soulmate. However, it all begins with first truly understanding what does love feel like.
21 Things To Describe The Feeling Of Love
The magic of love also lies in coming to an apt description for it. There might perhaps never be a conclusion on what does love feels like truly but we can certainly list the feelings you experience when someone sets your hearts ringing. Does it make your heart sing? Does your mood become lighter? Is there suddenly a pep in your step even when you’re walking into your boring workplace every morning? Because if this is true, you might be in love. Wondering what does love feel like in marriage or how to know if you really are in love? Let’s dive deeper and talk about what this thing that everybody seems to talk about – really feels like:
1. Lust plays a part but it’s not all
Lust or physical attraction might be the first stage of love. It’s your attraction that leads you to form a connection, spend time with him or her, and with time, consider a future. Lust begins on a solo trip but then is joined by other things – care, affection and concern to name just three. So if all you’re feeling is lust, don’t be disheartened and be quick to dismiss your feelings. There might be something brewing there!
2. Love is individualized
So your best friend goes on to describe the feeling of love as a sort of a roller coaster ride with thrills, excitement and unpredictability. You, on the other hand, feel nothing of that sort when you start dating, instead, you feel immense calmness. Well, let us tell you that neither of you is wrong. The basic rule to understand what does love feel like is to follow no rule! Like we said, everyone processes love in their own way and everyone’s neurochemicals do different things to them. Your feeling of true love is yours alone, cherish it and don’t compare.
3. He or she figures in your thoughts
Your thoughts mostly veer toward what matters and people that are important to you –negatively or positively. If you find yourself thinking more and more about him/her, if some movements, some places, colors or phrases instantly take your mind to them, it would be apt to say you are in love. When you are in love, you think about the person a lot and their face is also in your thoughts. What’s even crazier, is if they start showing up in your dreams! That means they’ve unlocked the gate to your subconscious and are on your mind, even when they’re actually not.
4. Change in body language
Instead of attempting to describe the feeling of love, ask people around you to describe how they see you when you are in the dating zone! Most often your body language gives you away. Do you quickly start flirting with your eyes without realizing it or does your heart rate suddenly increase and two minutes later, your face is flushed? Do your pupils dilate when you talk about them? Does an involuntary smile flash across your face when you are asked about your love life? The beauty of being in love is that it is difficult, nay impossible, to hide these telltale signs.
5. Love is many emotions
To answer what does love feel like, think of it as an umbrella that covers a lot of feelings. It would be rather unfair to describe love as a single feeling because it really can make you feel a host of emotions. You can experience several feelings simultaneously and they all merge with no one feeling dominating the other. There might be excitement, passion, exuberance and peace – it’s a mix of feelings that all add up to the feeling of love. There can be some negative emotions too like jealousy, insecurity, possessiveness and so on. As long as it’s in a moderate amount, we can call it healthy but one has to be careful as this kind of love can turn into something problematic.
6. Chemicals do play a role
Yes, there is a science to love too. Not everything is in your head. Or wait, maybe it is! As scientists have repeatedly pointed out, being in love releases happy hormones like dopamine, serotonin, etc. That’s why you get some crazy health benefits when you kiss. Focusing on only one person, daydreaming about them to such an extent that you forget everyone else is a direct impact of dopamine doing its thing – or what we describe the feeling of love to be.
7. Your lover influences you
It is not entirely your choice but the people you love tend to influence you a lot. When you are madly attracted to someone, you want to be the person they want you to be. This may work out positively or negatively depending entirely on the individual. But if you find yourself changing to fit a certain mold, know that you might be in love. When they say ‘I love it when you wear yellow’ and then all you want to do is wear your bright yellow sundress in front of him, it might be safe to say that you could be prey to the grasp of teenage love or just love in general. Love makes us want to be different and better – that’s what is most amazing about it.
8. It can take you over
While it depends on the intensity of the feelings, love can be all-consuming. If it is unrequited or one-sided, the longing and the yearning can be overwhelming and can make you spin out of control. In the worst-case scenario, it can border on obsession. You might even lose yourself in trying to win the other person, which is wrong. A few changes are fine but remember to be your own person even if you are mad about someone else.
9. You become more empathetic
What does love feel like in a marriage? Those who describe the feeling of love say it most certainly makes you empathetic and view the world with a more sensitive eye. If your beau is going through pain or a tough time, you will empathize and are likely to stand by them more than others. These are genuine, unfiltered and organic feelings toward someone who you want to support. This is what you might even call unconditional love.
10. You become possessive
Romantic love, unlike other forms of love, can’t be shared. When you are deeply in love, you naturally desire sexual gratification and sexual exclusivity, and if that doesn’t come, the feelings can turn to possessiveness and jealousy. Similarly, when the love is too deep, loyalty becomes paramount. Trust, in fact, is one of the strongest elements in the list of what does love feel like.
11. Love persists for a longer time
Often people believe that love at first sight is not love at all. Perhaps that is true for some cases. So what does love feel like then? It’s when the feeling of attraction, possessiveness, care etc come together to last for a longer time. Lust may disappear after a night, but love doesn’t. It may evolve as per the situation but it doesn’t ever end. It’s not something you can get over and walk away from after a breakup text or something that you can easily brush off if you stop seeing them everyday. The thing about love is, it stays.
12. You can be yourself
Interestingly, being in love feels fake in the initial stages. This is because, in the process of trying to impress each other, you often put up a façade and try to be something you might not actually be. It’s only when true love strikes and the relationship goes deeper that you can show your vulnerabilities, weakness and even the not-so-great side. Being your truest self is the most important answer to what does love feel like.
13. You miss them in their absence
You know it’s love when you think about them when they are not there. And suddenly, life seems complete when they are. You miss them dearly when they are away from you. Not just their presence but also the way they make you feel is what you really miss about them. If you are in a crowd yet feel alone, you feel their absence when they are away and you know it’s only their presence that can make a moment special…these experiences sum up the feeling of love.
14. Their happiness if your priority
You may be attracted to a man/woman, you may love hanging out with them, heck…you may even miss them! But it’s only when you are in love that you make them your priority. You want to be a better partner by being supportive of them and showing them that you are always by their side. This means putting their welfare above yours, making time for them when you are busy, taking part in things that are important to them and prioritizing their happiness over yours. Even if that means just bringing them a bowl of soup when they are sick, you want to do everything to show them you care.
15. You want to grow together
When you describe the feeling of love, certain words are important. It’s always ‘us’ instead of ‘me’, ‘the two of us’ instead of ‘I and myself’. Basically the joy of growing together is what love feels like to most people. Your goals align and there is a common direction which you want to take – a journey that you want to travel together in. And you know it is love when you know that you cannot embark on that road without holding the hand of the one you love most.
16. The connection is intense
Do you complete a sentence they begin? Do they call you just when you were thinking of calling them? Do they suddenly know when you’re uncomfortable at a party and swoop in to save you and show you a good time? The craziest thing about being in love, especially adolescent love psychology, is the intense intuition one is suddenly empowered with. You become more in tune with each other’s needs, wants and even gestures that everything seems to fall into place like pieces of a puzzle.
17. You don’t mind the negatives
Nobody is perfect but love makes you forget your beloved’s flaws as you are inclined to focus only on the positives. You do not look at the relationship flaws or use them against your love. In your eyes, they can do no wrong (even if facts prove otherwise!) as you are inclined to idealize the person you love. But here’s a warning – being in true love is great but do not get blinded or blindsided by it!
18. Every fight hurts
Couples fight all the time but when your fight with your beau hurts like hell, that pain aptly describes the feeling of love. Every nasty word that your partner utters pierces your heart and you feel disillusioned. So yes if you’re asking what does love feel like in a marriage, sometimes it just feels like lots and lots of arguments. But fighting is okay as long as you kiss and make up. What matters is that you want to fix the problem. You want to patch-up soon and may even forgo your ego to extend the olive branch and resolve the conflict.
19. You become more adventurous
When they say, people do crazy things in love, it means they are willing to try out stuff they may have never done before in life. That’s one way to describe the feeling of love! These can be anything – from physical activities to emotional risks – but you are willing to give it a shot because your soulmate tells you to. Love can be a crazy ride together.
20. It’s knowing who you want
Being with the right person makes you so complete that you do not contemplate being with anyone else. The most handsome man or the most gorgeous woman may be eyeing you but it doesn’t faze or confuse you. Your insane connection with your sweetheart makes you ignore others’ affections. Can you think of a better way to describe the feeling of love?
21. It makes you happy
Ultimately, this is all that matters. You may struggle to describe the feeling of love or still wonder as to what does love feels like, but there is no one answer to this query except that it makes you feel happy, no matter what type of love it is. You want to sing, dance and spend all your time with them. There is a certain joy in your heart, a lightness of being, all of which feels wonderful. That reason alone is enough to follow the course of true love. In a nutshell, love is intense, meaningful and passionate, and makes you a different person. It adds color to your life and gives it another direction altogether. Skeptics may blame it on the chemicals but the intangible and indescribable feeling that is yours alone knows that it’s the dose of invisible magic that makes it all worth it.
